Success and Failure in Rural Morocco

My Peace Corps service has been filled with ups and downs.  When we first get to country we get lots of papers about our emotional health, physical health, work, resources, yada yada.  But my favorite piece of paper is a roller coaster looking chart that explains our emotional wellbeing during these 2 years.  Everyone laughs at this paper when we first get it, but after about 6 months we realize it’s pretty much spot on.  Good days, bad days, happy days, sad days, depressed weeks, skipping through the field’s days…. I can literally experience every emotion I could think of in one day.  Go from dreading leaving my house to go buy milk, to laughing with people in souk, to wanting to punch a child in the face outside my house, to being super happy talking to a friend on the phone to crying during the Justin Beiber movie (yes- this last one happened.)  On top of the everyday stresses with language, being cold/hot, trying to understand what’s going on around me, etc. it’s easy to understand why this roller coaster could occur.  Then you throw work on top of that- that’s the cherry on top of it all.  Work here can be crazy, last minute, unorganized and everything in between… but it’s why I’m here.  So I wanted to share a recent success and recent failure with you… just so you could get a taste :)

Let’s start with the failure and just get it out of the way.  In June I was asked by my sbitar (local clinic) to represent the clinic at a meeting in Ouarzazate at the delegue (pretty much my Moroccan boss).  I had no idea why I was going- I just knew I was going to a meeting and I needed to find a lady from a French Association (didn’t even know her name.)  So I show up, am directed every which way in the building and finally find this lady, her translator, the delegue, my commune leader and another man from a village nearby.  The whole meeting is done in French/Arabic so you can imagine I’m a bit/a lot lost.  I learn that the French Association wants to bring doctors to my village for free exams in October.  Great news, right?  Fast forward to September.  I’m summoned to another meeting, this time invited by a man from my village.  We discuss the upcoming visit and hit a major road block.  The Association wants to come November 8^th.  But that’s L3id (the big holiday in my last post) so the arguing back and forth begins.  The French Association wins and they plan to come from the 5^th, 6^th, 7^th, break for l3id, 9^th, 10^th .  Great, right?  Everyone agrees this will work, myself and the other volunteers in the region will help with translation and it all sounds like peachy dandy…. Now fast forward to November.  About a week before l3id I go to the sbitar to make sure this is all still happening and am told that the Association was told not to even come because certain people in my community didn’t want to work so close to l3id.  I’m (of course) super angry about this and trying to figure out whats going on.  What could we do, could we still get the people to come, who made this decision… this is all running through my head in English while I’m trying to ask the questions in Tash.  And let me tell you, when I get overly excited, sad, tired, hungry or angry my language just *poof* disappears!!  Finally, I talk to some men that are pretty high up on the ‘power’ totem and they promise to make some phone calls and see what they can do.  I finally hear back the day before l3id…. And am told the Association isn’t come.  Sucks, right?  Want to know what sucks even more??  I heard TWO WEEKS LATER that the doctors came.  There was no one there for the free exams because no one was told about it and even if people would have shown up they would have had no one to translate.  So that just goes to show what months of planning and meeting can accomplish- right?  FAIL.

Now, lets rewind to Halloween. I’m in Ouarzazate to use internet, get money and attempt to get my permission from the ministry to be able to teach in the schools for the new school year.  I’d been in to get this form once before but was told to return, so I was hoping this would be a quick trip.  Yeah, right.  The man in charge needed a form from Peace Corps so I called Peace Corps.  After they talk in Arabic for a while I’m handed the phone back and asked by my Peace Corps boss if I’ll be helping with the health day this week.  I had no idea what he was talking about so he filled me in.  The ministry of Education was hosting a ‘health day’ in my site and wanted me help.  So I hang up and being asking questions about this (in Tash).  The man knows close to nothing and asking these questions is like pulling teeth.  After about 2 hours of exhausting language I’m told they want me and the other 3 volunteers in my area to help with the event.  There will be tooth brushing lessons (that we’ll do), eye exams (we’ll help with) and woman’s health information (that we’ll do too).  Keep in mind this is Monday that I’m in the office trying to get these forms and the event is on Wednesday.  So basically I had to organize the other 3 volunteers and myself to get this together, not really knowing what the heck we were signed up from.  Would be have our own classrooms, were we doing small groups, would we be working together or separate, would we have help?  No idea.  So- we show up having ZERO expectations and find all the important people from the ministry’s in Ouarzazazte, all the village leaders and school principals there.  Luckily, everything went as best as it could have.  We successfully taught over 200 children about brushing their teeth, about 25 women about some basic health and helped those 200 kids get their eyes checked.  And it all came together in a few days!  I’d say that’s a success!!

Eid Mubarak!!

Tomorrow is Eid al-Adha, الأضحى‎, Feast of Sacrifice, L3id Nufeska… any and all of the previous! 

This will be my second L3id here in Morocco and I couldn’t be more excited.  Some volunteers stock up and hide in their homes for the holiday, others try to travel to avoid the day but I have been counting down the days for about a month now (which isn’t easy since it’s a lunar holiday and I thought it was going to be on the 8^th until about a week ago!).  Last year the idea of L3id was a bit overwhelming since I had no idea what to expect, but this year I’m ready! 

So—what is L3id, you ask?  (Wow- who knew my blog would be so informative?)

Eid al-Adha is celebrated annually on the 10th day of the 12th and the last Islamic month of Dhu al-Hijjah (ذو الحجة) of the lunar Islamic calendar.  Eid al-Adha celebrations start after the Hajj (Hajj= the annual pilgrimage to Mecca in Saudi Arabia by Muslims worldwide)  The date is approximately 70 days (2 Months & 10 days) after the end of the month of Ramadan.  Wikipedia L3id Info

“Ibrahim, known as Abraham in the Christian and Jewish traditions, was commanded by God to sacrifice his adult son. He obeyed and took Ishmael (Ismail or Ismael) to Mount Moriah. Just as he was to sacrifice his son, an angel stopped him and gave him a ram to sacrifice in place of his son. Some people dispute that the son of sacrifice was Isaac (Isḥāq). Regardless, these events are remembered and celebrated at Eid al-Adha. At Eid al-Adha, many Muslims make a special effort to pray and listen to a sermon at a mosque. They also wear new clothes, visit family members and friends and may symbolically sacrifice an animal in an act known as qurbani. This represents the animal that Ibrahim sacrificed in the place of his son. In some traditionally Muslim countries (Like Morocco) families or groups of families may purchase an animal known as udhiya, usually a goat or sheep, to sacrifice" L3id Information

Go to those links for more information… its really interesting stuff and I was tempted to just copy and paste the whole thing, but thought I’d lose some people.  (Which might have happened anyway- but oh well!)

Here in Morocco families purchase a ram to sacrifice to symbolize these events.  It’s a huge holiday (Think Christmas almost everywhere else in the world). Schools and all official buildings close for the week and family members all travel home to spend the holiday together.  All the kids get new clothes to wear for the holiday and the meat from the animal is eaten throughout the week- every single part!  I asked my friends what their favorite parts of the Ram were yesterday and their answers were the liver (Agree- DELISH!) the eyes and the head.  Families that can afford it usually have multiple rams (my host family had 2 last year). 

….And tomorrows the day!!  I’ve promised my friend Jamila that I’d spend the slaughter (usually at about 930 am- after the king kills his ram) with her family.  I took lots of pictures last year, but I want to get a video of the event this year so look for that (if you’ve got the stomach for it!).  I’m going to make some chocolate no-bake cookies-they’re a hit here since they are so sweet- to bring over too.  After Jamila’s I have 2 other families I promised I’d go see and walking between houses usually means having to stop, have tea, and make kababs (my favorite part of l3id) at various others homes.  So- needless to say, tomorrow will be a long, exciting and VERY full of meat day :)

Eid Mubarak!

Telling time in Morocco

I have now been here in Morocco for 18 months, with only 7ish left.  When I think about it like that I can’t believe it… the time has flown by.  But then when I sit down and actually think about all the things that have happened over these 18 months… I feel like I’ve been here forever.  This is home. People here always ask if I’m tmirt (settled).  My new joke (jokes here are typically pretty lame… think grandpa jokes that everyone laughs at but no one thinks is funny) is that yes, I’m mirġ. I’m half Moroccan and half American- this is half of my home!  People love it, but it’s kinda true.  These people have welcomed me into their homes, their country and treated me like one of their own.  And I’m so blessed to be able to have this experience.

Over the last 18 months I’ve realized there are many ways to tell time… for example, I can tell the time in weeks by the amount of henna that has grown out of my nails, I can usually tell the approximate time of day by the amount of sunlight out or the call to prayers, I can tell what month it is based on the crops growing in the fields, I can tell the day of the week based on the freshness of fruits/veggies at my vegetable guys store, or if its Sunday because its Souk, I can tell if it’s a week day (usually if there are no strikes) by seeing if the kids are playing outside my house or not…. I feel like we have these clues to the time of day, day of the week and month in America but do we ever stop to notice them? 

I often tell people at home that I feel like I’ve learned more from my experience here or from my community than I ever think I could hope to teach them (cliché but true).  One of the biggest things this country has taught me is patience and to stop and enjoy life.  I remember having my schedule down to pretty much every minute of the day in America… and here if I have one small task to do in the day it’s gonna be a good day.  I have the time to stop and have tea with women in the fields, its ok to have tea and basic conversation with the men I’m meeting with for a project before we even speak a word of work, it’s not uncommon for me to go to Souk to buy just milk and end up spending hours talking to all the store owners along the way (and forget to buy the milk), waiting for a taxi or bus for hours is just how it is, or having a counterpart show up an hour late for a meeting is just… that.  When I first got here to Morocco things like this drove me crazy, I was in my America-get work done- mindset.  And I’m not going to lie, sometimes I fall back into that and get a bit stir crazy waiting over an hour for people to show up and a taxi to leave, but Morocco has taught me to appreciate the moment.  Like a good friend of mine once told me “I know it’s hard but really just try to enjoy your time there because it will be over. And then it’s over.  Your home will always be here.”  I don’t know if she knows how much that meant to me, but that quote has been with me since the day she sent it.

Also in relation to time, I feel like in the beginning months here in Morocco I sort of ‘wished my time away.’  It’s not that I wasn’t loving my time here, but it’s hard sometimes- I miss America, my friends, family, the food, my independence and freedom to do or say whatever I wanted.  I still have moments like this- I don’t think I’ve ever been such rollercoaster of emotions as I am here.  I will literally have to force myself to leave the house one day, dread speaking to people along the way and then somewhere in the walk a flip switches and I end up wanting to talk to anyone and everyone along the way- about the weather, about Lily, about life… and end up spending hours in Souk talking to men and walk home on clouds mystified that I live HERE- with the beautiful mountains in the background, walking through postcard like fields and rivers to get home to my crazy dog barking on the roof of my mud house.  Now I have less than 7 months left and I’m grasping at time for dear life.  Don’t get me wrong- I’m excited at the idea of going back to America but this whole experience- all the amazing people I’ve met along the way, all the work I’ve had the privilege of doing… the thought of leaving that really does make me sad.

Well dear readers of mine- my tummy just growled (another way to tell the time) so lunch must be made.  Until next time….

Just another day...

First of all-- I survived my second Ramadan!  It’s now been over a month since it ended and boy am I glad it’s over.  It was a great experience fasting with my community though- I got very mixed responses from people when I told them I was fasting.  Some people were excited and gave me praise, told me to sit and rest or invited me to breakfast with their families, others called me a liar and made me prove to them I was fasting (which was ok sometimes, but when I was extra hungry/thirsty this response didn’t put me in a good mood) and others thought I was crazy for fasting when I didn’t have to.  I ended up breaking my fast a few days early, since I had a friend come to visit and since he wasn’t fasting I didn’t want to continue.  But I successfully fasted for 23 days!!

Lots has been going on here work-wise.  Its weird going from almost a year of begging people for work to not being able to go to Souk without being bothered for a new project or idea.  The desk project is ALMOST complete—yes, I know… I’ve been saying this for a WHILE.  But that’s just how things goes around here.  The blackboards are the last items that need to be delivered and I’ve been bothering the carpenter about them for weeks but INCHALLAH that will get done this week.  (IT DID!  I finally got the last receipts and its all DONEEEEE!)  The project for the Sanitation System is coming along slowly… all the supplies were purchased over Ramadan and digging for the pipes and pits has begun.  I hope to make it to the village soon to check in on things.

I have two new sitemates!  Long story here that I won’t get into, but it’s great for the community since we will be the last volunteers in the area.  So there are now 4 Americans roaming the dirt roads of Tidili- haha!  Team Tidili!!!  Here is a story about house-hunting for my new site mates…. Think about this next time you go on Craigslist or to a relator for a new place to rent :)

So we (myself, Alexa and Leighanne) heard there was a house available in a village about 8 K down the road and wanted to go check it out.  We were told to go to Souk (the main center) at 4 oclock and assumed this meant that we would be getting a ride.

• 4:00 pm- SO we show up, talk talk talk, learn about another project that the people in the community, drink a little tea, yada yada.
• 5:00 pm- We are finally are shown to a transit with about 10 others. This must be the worlds S-L-O-W-E-S-T transit.  A ride that should have taken us about 15 minutes probably took about 40. Along the way the driver is pointing out all the towns along the way… beautiful ride up though!
• 6:00 pm- We are dropped off at a café and ask if this is the village with the house to rent.  We’re told its not and that we have to walk through another village to get to it-no biggie, right?  An older man offers to walk us to the village but then hands us off to a kid about 5 minutes into the walk.  The teenager is then instructed to bring us to the house that’s for rent.
• 6:30 pm-  After climbing through a village we arrive, tired, to discover the man who is supposed to show us the house isn’t around.  We are directed to the teenagers house instead.
• 7:00 pm- We decide we cant wait any longer, its getting dark and we need to get back.  So we start walking- very quickly- to the main road to try and stop some sort of transit to take us home.  Along the way, though, everyone keeps inviting us in for tea or to stay the night.  We try to explain we need to get home but everyone tells us we’ll never find transport so we should just stay.  We don’t want to… so we keep on keepin on.
• 7:30 pm- We reach the road and start waving down anything and everything that passes.  It’s starting to get really cold by now, and we’re starting to get really worried… finally we hail down a truck and get thrown in with about 15 other men (literally, most of them were hanging off the truck, but since we were ladies we were able to sit in the bed).  Oh yeah, and there are a few cows in the truck too…. I wish I took at a picture, but it didn’t seem appropriate at the time.  During the car ride every single man asks me to marry him, and one of the guys even gives me an extra jacket he has to keep me warm. (I got to keep the jacket, so at least I got something outta it all!) I talk to the guys the whole 20 minutes ride home- quite an interesting conversation…. We discussed how (in my perspective) men in Morocco don’t have it as tough as the ladies, how far/big America is, how a lot of people in America go to college (even girls, like me!) but not many from my area will…. You get the jest. 
• 8:00 pm- The truck finally arrives at a village about a kilometer from my house so after arguing about a price, we get out and start walking home with our phone flashlights to my house. 
• 8:20 pm- We finally get home, laughing about the day.  Alexa and Leighanne then decide to start making something for dinner.  I have most of my food stashed in a bamboo dresser to keep the mice out, but recently they had got tricky so I had the dresser closed with rope to keep the creatures out….. but just as Leighanne opens the dresser a mouse LEAPS out at her.  I hear screaming in the kitchen to find them both in the corner- the mice have chewed through the BACK of the dresser.  Everything is now is thick plastic bins around my kitchen……..

….. Welcome to my life :)

Videos from Country Part I

Yes, i'm alive after Ramadan!  Its on my to-do list to write a little more about my overall experience with fasting and such but for now I'm in the city so I wanted to post some videos I've taken while being here.  Below are some videos i've had for a while.... Enjoy!

Snow Days

This is a video I took up on my roof in March.  I'm on the phone with a friend (hence the "hang ons" in my part) because i wasn't sure how my community would feel about me filming them on their roofs.  The houses here are made of mud so when it snows a lot everyone has to go on their roofs to shovel the snow off (otherwise the snow melts into water and the houses start to leak or fall apart.)  I just did a big circle with the camera so you could get a sense so everyone on their roofs and all the snow thats fallen onto mine.

Spring Camp Dancing

This video is from Spring Camp.  Spring Camp is an camp that youth development volunteers organize and help facilitate every year.  All PCVs are asked to help teach English and work with the kids.  In April I went with 5 other volunteers to help out.  There was a lot of dancing like this that occurred between events and every evening.  One thing we get pretty comfortable with here as volunteers is making fools of ourselves.  This is just one example with all the dancing/clapping/smiling.

Morocco's Own MJ

This video was from one of two talent shows we had.  This kid was a gooood dancer.  Other kids did dance acts, sang (acapella!!  These kids had no fear!), did comedy kits, told jokes and lots of other stuff.  It was fun to watch the kids performing for each other.  If a talent show like this was happening in America I think people would be bullying each other, making fun of each others or too afraid to do the acts they did in front of their peers.  I was sooo impressed with these kids confidence! 

....to be continued in the next blog post!

10 days and counting...

Today is August 11^th, which means my 10^th day of fasting.  No water or food from sunup (about 330am) until sundown (about 730pm).  It also means 10 days of lfdur (break-fast) with various families in my community… Its been really interesting to see peoples reactions when I tell them I’m fasting.  Tonight I thought I’d write up some of the various… situations that fasting has resulted in.  Read and enjoy (and comment!)

Tonight I was chatting with Caity on the phone.  Shes also fasting, so we have phone dates at night after breakfast to help each other stay awake and also just to catch up.  We were talking about how on the first day of fast we both had a moment where we asked ourselves if we could brush our teeth.  I seriously sat in front of the mirror for about 10 minutes wondering if I was technically ‘allowed’ to do this.  I mean, I’m not eating the toothpase, right?  But what if a little accidently goes down my throat?  Then am I not technically fasting?  I think it quite interesting that both of us thought twice about brushing even though neither of us are fasting for religious reasons.  I guess that’s just what happens when you’ve been in country for 16 months. 

Can you brush your teeth during the fasting hours of ramadan?

Answer: yes because tooth paste is not something you consume (fasting or not you spit it out). Of course you should be careful with the water and make sure you don't swallow any. But if you do swallow by accident then it does not break your fast. Allah swt says : And there is no sin for you in the mistakes that ye make unintentionally.) (Al-Ahzab 33: 5)The Prophet saws also said : "My nation shall not be held accountable for the mistakes they do unintentionally, out of forgetfulness, and under duress." (Reported by Ibn Majah) And Allah swt knows best

My second major fasting dilemma was if I should take my inhailer.  I mean, technically I’m not supposed to eat anything, right?  So should I be breathing things in either?  In the end I decided I’d just do it…. I guess I’d rather ‘breakfast’ and be able to breathe than risk an asthma attack in the mountains of Morocco.

If I have asthma, can I still use my puffer when I’m fasting?



Yes, you can still use your puffer during Ramadan without breaking your fast. This is because it is simply compressed air that you are inhaling into your lungs.

On my first day of fasting I decided (like the rest of my village) to take it easy and hang out in my house.  Us PCVs spend a lot of time sharing and watching variously downloaded tv shows and movies.  One of my new favorites has become Parenthood.  So I sit down, with my fan blowing on me to settle in and watch a few episodes.  Its only about 12 by now, so I have about 7 more hours ahead of me.  Well, well… guess what episode I’m on?  That’s right… the Thanksgiving one.  Being here in Morocco any show about or featuring food is hard to watch, since cravings for things such as bacon, cheese, alcohol and other delicious foods we take for granted in America are quite common.  But sitting through that episode, without my morning cup of coffee and knowing I wouldn’t be able to each for another 7 hours-  well, that, my friends, was rough.    

Many people in my community ask if I’m fasting, since its very public knowledge that I didn’t last year.  One of my favorite, and perhaps most hilarious moments thus far has been when an old man in my Souk asked if I was fasting.  I told him yes, and then he called me a liar.  After a few rounds of “no, I’m not lying” he pointed out that I was wearing chapstick.  Well, yes, I am- of course. Its hot outside, I’m thirsty and I always wear chapstick, I explained.  (Side note, I had no idea what the word for chapstick might be so I kept calling it medicine for lips).  So while I’m trying to defend myself to this man about my medicine for lips he continues to call me a liar.  Finally after about 10 minutes of me  explaining I don’t in-fact eat the stuff, I give up and tell him fine- I’m not fasting.  He kindly smiled and me and said goodbye.  You win that round, old man.

Can I wear lip gloss in Ramadan?



Yes, you can wear lip gloss to moisten your lips when you are fasting, as long as you do not swallow it. 


Lots of other things have happened in the last 10 days including getting a free half kilo of bananas from my vegetable guy because he was so happy I was fasting, almost passing out because of standing up too fast, lots of hours of saying “yes, Ramadan is hard” to various friends and explaing to people that just because I’m fasting I’m not becoming a Muslim.  Overall, its been a tough but interesting experience…. Lets see what the next 19-20 days have in store!

Ps.  While looking up the few questions I had I found this interesting website that had a lot of answers to the questions I had about Ramadan…. Check it out if you're interested!

Adventures in Fasting... Happy Ramadan!

So this is my second of everything in country.  Just celebrated my second 4^th of July, about to celebrate my second Thanksgiving and this is my second Ramadan.  (Go HERE to check out my blog from last year to learn more about Ramadan).  I didn’t fast last year, since I did a bit of traveling in Spain and just honestly didn’t want to.  But I decided I wanted to try and fast this year.  What does that mean you ask?  That means no food or water during sunlight hours which is from the first call to prayer at 3am until the 4^th call to prayer at about 730pm—yes, 16 hours.  And this Ramadan is in August, with the longest and hottest days.  Great time to give it a go, huh?

I’m now on day 3 of fasting.  I wasn’t so much worried about not eating during the day, I could survive being hungry a few hours but the water was the part I was most worried about.  And now that I’ve actually been fasting I think both suck- equally. 

Fasting is intended to educate the Muslim in spirituality, humility and patience. It is a time to cleanse the soul, focus attention on God, and put into practice selflessness.” http://www.whatisramadan.com  

Its only been 3 days now but I think it will be good for me. 

The hardest part so far has been how lethargic I feel during the day after about 4 (when I’m reaaaally hungry and thirsty) and also after breaking fast.  The first night I went to my landlords and yesterday I went to my friends house to break fast.  Its fun being with others who are equally as hungry and thirsty as me but the food they eat has a LOT of sugar.  I mean its great, don’t get me wrong, but after being hungry all day I’ve been craving some strange things.  So what I’ve been doing is breaking fast with families (eating the askeef (white creamy soup), bread, dates, figs and tea) and then going home and preparing a real dinner of some sort (lots of chicken, yummy!)    Language is also very hard when I’m hungry or tired so it’s been interesting attempting conversations right before break fast.

Today will be my first day of walking to souk (assuming this rain slows down) so we’ll see how I do with that.  Its about a 20-30 minute walk each way and I have to talk to some people about work so this will be my first of many challenges this Ramadan since the last few days have been spent in my house or in my dowar trying to adjust my body to no food or water.

I’ll try to post another update soon about fasting.  Ramadan Kareem everyone!